Written March 24, 2014(edited 2017)
“Healing from our past can be a painful thing. A splinter hurts going in, and it hurts coming out also. But it must come out or it will fester and get infected, causing more damage than the original hurt.” ~Doug
Something to Ponder….
I don’t know about anyone else reading this, but, I know I’ve made A LOT of mistakes over the years. I’ve even hurt a few people too, from close family & friends to acquaintances or people I hardly know. Many, MANY things I’ve done or said I regret doing or saying. The bad thing of it is that I can’t go back and change anything I’ve done or said. I don’t have a time machine. What I can do is make amends to the people I’ve hurt and do my best to not repeat what I did. I can also forgive myself for what I did. Amends are something we do to compensate or make up for a wrongdoing.
You see, not to long ago I learned that I deserve to forgive myself as much as the person who hurt me. When I don’t forgive myself for past wrongdoings or things I’ve done or said, I rob myself of enjoying the moments of today and sometimes even the future. By dwelling on the past I let that poison fester and grow in my heart and mind until I either go crazy or I finally forgive myself and release those feelings to my Higher Power for Him to take from me.
All of us have said or done things in the past that we wished we hadn’t. We may not have a time machine to go back and change what’s happened but we can use the past as a tool to learn in the present and grow for the future. Dwelling on it does nothing for us but keep us stuck in that painful, festering, muck of a past. Perhaps we even continue repeating those same mistakes and continuing to feel the pain from it. Instead of doing that, we can begin with forgiving ourselves and look at the situation objectively. What part did we play and how can we make amends for our part? When we are able to do this we can begin to heal and move forward. Oh yea, a little tip? Sometimes it’s good to talk about this with another trusted person who is more objective and can help us to see what we did wrong.
I’m reminded of a famous movie I watched while caring for a child some time ago. In the movie “Lion King” is a scene where a juvenile/teenage Simba has run away from a tragic accident he thought he caused involving his father. He ends up having an “un”fortunate run in with a crazy baboon named Rafiki. During their conversation Rafiki bonks Simba on the head. Simba a bit annoyed and confused by this says, “Ouch! What was that for?!” Rafiki says, “It doesn’t matter. It’s in the past.” Simba, “Yea but it still hurts!” Rafiki, “Ah yes, the past can hurt, but, the way I see it you can either run from it or learn from it!”